..'neath the weight of my own making..

underneath the toppling tower that terrifies
trembling beneath the great growing gravity
ever pulling downward, pushing downward
pebble by particle by pearl
bubble by bead by bit
sands stacking, propelling descent
heave, gasping for even a waft of
incandescence, radiance, beacon or blaze
breeze, ventilation, or some small suggestion
of anything other than continually falling, failing beneath the weight of my own making

is was will be

wonder if everyone does this
torturing with pictures
of you
of us
us that never is was will be
and so drone on
just another one
one
singular
is was will be
singularly equipped with dwelling not daring since such an hour; a glimpse was given
uncov'ring that which once so carefully tucked beneath the layers of cool has since burst forth with the thrust and opposition previously unbeknownst to a conscience mind
looking at you looking back, but whats inside - dare not know
rather listlessly wander through the passages of mind that outline the chapters wherein the flicker of is was will be still live

.double dare.

i have to be careful around you
i have to be cautious
you make me break my own rules
my own laws
my own modes of protection and prevention
because you make me hope your intention
is something
more
than everything i seemingly know it to be
dare to hope
double dare not to

Valentine <3

Valentines, a special day
but should not be the only way
we get up enough nerve to say
I Love You! and Be Mine today

<3

Happy Valentines Day
Happy V-to-the-Tenth

V-Day 1({})

2.11.08

if brevity's the soul of wit
then curtness' slave am i
ever striving on to please
and to induce that wry
crinkled starting smile
as it rises in your cheek
for to affect, effect on you
is truly what i seek

2.10.08

twisted up and turning
these synapses of mine
and nothing done can quell them
not even how much wine
i drink, i drank, ive drunk
to try and keep me from myself
to safely hide my memories
caged imprisoned on that shelf

2.5.08

whence upon a wondering
a wandering of the mind
a doodle dreamed in dream land
the begining of a wind
ing up of the old music box
that lives in head and heart
to dwell on blissful mem'ries
that never got their start

laughs

there are many within me
they vary by day
they change with the wind
or the person or say
ing that comes right along
with the quip, quirk or smile
and often they seem
to make it all just worth while

The Laying On Of Hands

the laying on of hands
what makes them think its ok
to take her form and change it
to take their inner out on her outer
who let them think that its ok
to bruise and batter and beat
to strike
to take on the space and form of someone else
in a completely non consensual, non respectful
downright dissembling manner
God, who ever led them to believe it is in any way O-K
who could have led them in that thought
and beyond, no one to have corrected
re-addressed the mis education
I am angry at them
At the violent and their teachers
I am SO ANGRY at them
for their actions and their continuing of this mis guided methodology
my anger stands up on my words
and from my podium of prose i shout

UNTIL THE VIOLENCE STOPS
http://www.vday.org/

~Vanilla Vagina Warrior

..something new..

something new and changing
in this different, different world
growing, going, showing
more a woman than a girl
unsure, unwise, unstable
but keep going none the less
eventually ill figure out this life
this akward, blooming mess